You Matter!!!

We are all born into this world innocent and mindless.

We are all born into this world innocent and mindless. We are dependant on our caretakers to teach us what we need to know. What we are taught by our caretakers, our teachers and the social structure of our culture takes shape on a blank canvas that becomes our personality as we grow.

We are taught as children what is acceptable behavior and what is not. We are taught to conform to become socially acceptable in the eyes of our parents, our peers and in public. The foundational teachings we learn in early childhood seems to establish a deep-seated belief that conditions us to seek love, approval, and acceptance from other people in order to feel good enough about ourself, to feel worthy of attention and to feel of value in our world.

I can tell you that when a child is abused, locked in a closet, beaten nearly to death, shunned, ignored, disrespected, defiled, violated, blown off or unacknowledged repetitively they begin to feel as if they don’t matter.  Some of us feel invisible, unworthy, unloveable, unwanted or not good enough.

Some feel as if no one sees them, others don’t wish to be seen.  They feel as if they don’t fit, no one understands them and that no one really hears them. Some stay in the background, blend into the walls and watch in silence. Others believe that no one cares if they live or die, no wants them around and no one cares about what they think or what they are feeling anyway.

Repetitive events of abuse tend to ignite a mental thinking pattern of their parents’ voices evoking a cycle of self-judgment, self-criticism, shame and unwarranted guilt that takes them down a very dark road and drops them off into a pit of depression, apathy, anxiety, and self-destruction.

Some adapt and manage to become functional. You see them on the streets. You see them at the checkout counter in your local store, you even speak with them in your office…but you wouldn’t notice them as an abuse survivor if you didn’t know their story. Some become abusive to others and to themselves.

As they grow into adults, they begin to wonder why they do the things they do and why they think the way they do. No one has ever told them that it doesn’t have to stay that way. No one ever taught them how to heal their old wounds. So let me share this to those who still wonder and wander aimlessly for answers…

STOP! Stop the mindless repetitive parent tape rolling around in your head!

Push the eject button, pull out the damn tape and burn that sucker…

Now repeat this to yourself…every time it tries to replay in an echo anyway.

YOU MATTER!

Rise & Shine (CC0-courtesy of Pexels.com)

YOU MATTER MORE THAN YOU KNOW…

What you Think Matters.

What you Feel Matters.

Your Voice Matters.

Your Life, Your Dreams and Goals Matter!.

You would not have been born in this world

…if you were not meant to be here.

You don’t need to strive to BE someone

…because you ARE someone!

You are here for a reason.

Your existence has a purpose.

You are here to learn, to evolve and to be the best that you can be.

You just need to Dream it into existence.

Abundant Gratitude

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Abundant Gratitude Courtesy of Pixabay.com – CC00

 

I am grateful for Life and the ability to breathe.
I am grateful for all of Life’s mysteries.
I am grateful for my senses and sensibilities.

 I am grateful to my parents for being absent…
… you made me unafraid to be on my own.
… you taught me to be my own woman.

I am grateful for your obtuse abuse…
…you taught me resilience,
…you taught me strength
…you taught me self-respect and resolve.

I am grateful for your criticisms…
…you taught me to be critical in my thinking.
…you taught me to think for myself.
…you taught me to see things from a different perspective.
…you taught me not to believe everything I heard.

I am grateful for betraying my innocence and trust…
…you opened my eyes to my reality.
…you taught me to see things more clearly.
…you taught me trust must be earned.

I am grateful to my siblings for shunning me…
…you taught me self-preservation was key.

I am grateful to all my family for abandoning me…
…you taught me to be self-reliant.
…you taught me to hold my head up and walk alone.

I am grateful to my ex-husband for your abuse…
…you taught me longsuffering and temperance.
…you became the catalyst for my healing journey from abuse.

I am grateful to my current husband and my children…
…you taught me acceptance.
…you taught me patience.
…you taught me it was safe to trust.
…you taught me it was safe to speak up.
…you taught me it was safe to step out of my comfort zone.
…you taught me it was okay to be who I am.
…you taught me Love really does exist in this world.
…you taught me to Believe in myself.

I am grateful You are here.
I am grateful You hear my heart.
I am grateful to You…for just being You.