I have had several key experiences that affected me before I turned 21.
The first chapter of my memoir recalls the event of my birth with a vine around my neck that was strangling me. The second is my first encounter with hearing Spirits Voice, audibly at the age of four.
The “The Green Bathroom” was the first memory of brutal physical abuse that affected me deeply, and I believe the emotional effects from that event became a major factor in the development of my personality and thinking patterns.
I am near the completion of 15 Chapters now and I have found myself facing an internal dilemma. The circumstances surrounding the central event of my book. An event that made the news in my younger years. It is a matter of public record so I know it is nothing really new to me; however, mainstream media fileted the facts to keep things newsworthy. The media relegated the assumption and presumption of “guilt” that marred my character in the public eye and even my ability to get work to this day.
The fact IS – that I was a key eyewitness to a murder, and to the events that led up to that murder, even though I was arrested and charged with the crime. I was, in fact, exonerated of all charges. A fact not listed on the public records. The experience took 13 months of my life away from me. An experience that nearly took my life in the process and sent me on a trip through a living nightmare. It took my dignity, my self respect, my honor and my self esteem for telling the Truth.
I am no longer a victim, but the residue of the abuse, and the abuse of power in this situation over my life still angers me and causes a great deal of anxiety. Do I want to relive the experience by writing it? Hell no! But I know and have known that my story must be told. The Truth indeed has set me free.
Perhaps it will help another from falling into the same trap, and if they do find themselves caged by “false accusations, false perceptions, assumptions and presumptions” in a similar situation, perhaps they will learn how to overcome the humiliation and degradation. It will certainly make them more cautious and aware of those around them that call themselves a friend.